I need to stop blogging/doing things in general whilst talking with another person or being generally distracted. My last post is barely coherent. You’d think I was still in da club.
I wasn’t. It was a day later. I was fully recovered.
Oh well, such is life, am I right???
So, I’ve decided I need a new self-improvement project. (Because apparently I’ve decided I am a fixer-upper…) Today the boyfriend accused me of being shy. (By the way, how much do you love the word “accused”? I literally cannot hear/use it without imagining someone pointing a finger judgmentally and shouting, “SHAME!” …the boyfriend didn’t do that, though.)
I’ve often had this secret insecurity that I am actually really, really boring. I mean, seriously, someone asks me what’s new, I’m like, “Um, not much. I mean, the job is going well. I’m not sick…so that’s cool. …*pfffooo….* What’s new with you?”
Or, if I’m in a group of people I don’t know, I’ll sit back and observe rather than dive in with my own thoughts and opinions. So I don’t think the fella is entirely wrong. In general, if you throw me into a new group of people I get a bit more reserved. (For those of you who have known me for years and think this is a bald-faced lie…) And part of my secret insecurity is that people read this reservation as “SNOOZE-FEST” when they first meet me.
It’s one thing I’ve always envied about my sister; she may not be the easiest person to get along with, but she’s interesting. People have always liked her right when they meet her. Whereas they actually had to get to know me to think I was an all right person.
Bah, so this post is rapidly spinning out of control. The point is, I want to be friendlier. Or at least more out-going. So I’m resolving to — stick with me on this one — talk to strangers more.
Calm down, parents. I don’t mean like, gin-soaked stranger in the heap outside the neighborhood Rite-Aid stranger. I mean like, co-workers I don’t know yet. Friends of friends at social gatherings. Maybe even actual strangers I’m waiting in line with or something.
I think I can do it. I mean, I talk to all of you all the time, and anyone could be reading this. ANYONE. (Ok, mostly my relatives. I’ll take what I can get.)