I read a Diane Von Furstenberg quote the other day that for whatever reason has just stayed with me:
IT SOUNDS SO SIMPLE, RIGHT?
Being the woman I want to be has always been a sort of unspoken goal of mine. I would chase it by sort of emulating women around me who I saw living how I thought I wanted to live. As time went on, the women I emulated evolved and my imitations slowly merged into what I guess you could call myself.
My dear, dear friend Michelle often tells me I’m living the way she wants to be living in a few years. Which, I’m not even kidding, makes me do one of those cartoonish-looking-behind-me-then-looking-back-then-pointing-to-myself-all-”who me?” moves.
Because some days I’m like, “Dude, you GOT this. You are SO an adult.” And then I’m like, “Wait, you totally just made macaroni and cheese for dinner.” But then I’ll be all, “Yeah, but I used the alternate recipe which calls for Greek yogurt instead of milk and butter, TOTALLY classing this joint up.” But then when I’m rinsing out the pan, I’m like, “Really, homegirl? You’re licking the stuck-on pieces of macaroni off the spoon you used to make it like it’s a batter-covered beater?” But then I’m like, “Well, at least I’m DOING dishes like a grown-ass WOMAN.” And then I’ll go sit on the couch to eat dinner and watch my husband play video games.
And then I’m all like, “Oh. Right.”
Lately I’ve been going through a lot of changes in my life. I went from a girl who knew exactly what she wanted to do with her life career-wise but had no idea how to figure out the rest of it, to a girl who has just about everything figured out except the whole “what do I want to be when I grow up” thing. (Well, and, ya know, how to wear my hair.)
In an effort to be more content until I get that whole business resolved, I’m going to try to focus on the things I do have figured out. I have a stable, supportive job. I have a solid relationship and friendship with my husband. I’m in decent shape, I have good friends, I’m hospitable, and I’m pretty sure no one ever looks at me like, “What is that girl’s deal??” (At least that I know of.)
So here’s to being the kind of woman (or man) we all want to be.
I wonder if DVF ever eats mac’n’cheese for dinner.
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