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Vivi and I really love going to our neighborhood playground. No, like, seriously.

If you follow me on Instagram, you already know this because we post about it almost every day. If the weather is above 45 degrees, we are outdoors.

Which isn’t to say the park is perfect. I mean, it’s a New York City park. If I had a dollar for every time Vivi excitedly held up a piece of garbage and I had to swoop in with a faux-cheerful, “Ooh, let Momma see!,” I could afford to buy a house with a yard and build my own dang trash-free playground. But, for the most part, it is reasonably clean and well maintained.

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More importantly, it is frequented. Vivi doesn’t get to spend a lot of time with kids her own age, and while I don’t actually think it’s crucial at this stage of her development, I think she is more likely to learn about sharing and friendly interaction earlier on if she is at least presented with more age-appropriate opportunities. All that is a fancy way of saying that a lot of kids her age go to the park and I think it’s good for her to learn how to be around them without appearing to be a total sociopath.

There is one aspect of going to the park that I don’t seem to have cracked yet, and, honestly, it has nothing to do with Vivi. It’s the other moms. I consider myself a reasonably friendly individual, able to carry on a conversation with literally anyone if I want to, but, by and large, the other moms are just not that friendly.

I mean, it’s not like I don’t understand it at all. We only started going to the park after Vivi could walk, meaning we’ve only got about six months under our belts. That being said, we are regular. We’re at the park way more often than most of the snooty moms. So…I don’t get it. But recently I have started to notice more moms with toddlers Vivi’s age, and they tend to be much friendlier, so maybe it’s just a “stick to your own kind” kind of thing? Who knows?

Regardless, here are ten things every mom has thought whilst at the playground at some point:

1. No one is here…is it too cold for the park and no one told me? Am I a bad mom? I didn’t think I was, but here I am freezing my baby to death and– oh, wait, here comes another kid. Phew.

2. THERE ARE NO DRAWERS HERE FOR YOU TO EMPTY OVER AND OVER WHILE I TRY TO CLEAN! I LOVE THE PARK!

3. Don’t touch that don’t touch that don’t touch that!

4. I love getting a second to actually scroll through Instagram without worrying that my kid is going to do something cra– OH MY GOD WHERE IS MY KID?! I HATE THE PAR– Oh, there she is. Phew.

5. Is that kid crowding my daughter? Should I step in? Should I let her– never mind, she just strong-armed a 4-year-old. She’s good.

6. That kid is crying. That kid is crying and no one is helping. WHERE IS YOUR MOTHER?

7. My toddler is clearly playing with a toy that is not hers. But she’s also not crying, so I’m going to sit here pretending like I don’t see until the owner pitches a fit and demands it back.

8. I know the name of over half the kids here, but I couldn’t tell you their moms’ names for the life of me. “Oh, hi, Sam’s mom!

9. I packed snacks, extra wipes, a towel to wipe wet swings, and toys for the park today. I’m probably the best mom ever.

10. Oh, you just want to play with that stick you found for 20 minutes? Cool. I’m an idiot.

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One Response to Revelations of a new mom at the playground

  • Jeri L. Blanchard says:

    Grandma said your evaluation exhausted her! I loved it and have probably thought all those things at one point of raising 5 children. Very true and cute!

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